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#170 The EAW’s Prayer

September 10, 2012

submitted by Molly (who blogs at Molly In Monrovia) and Alex

Dear Lord,

Today, aid me in my otherwise mundane tasks, that they shall not
result in gangrene or identity theft.

By Your grace, cancel the flight of our donor, so that I might have 24
more hours to shiny up our anecdotal success stories with pictures of
children

May the M&E consultant be amenable to case studies, or at least
receptive to my sexual advances

May the Internet, like Your mercy, flow abundantly, so that I might
watch that new Rihanna video on Youtube.

Please Lord, give me the serenity to accept the dangers of salads
the courage to eat the unidentifiable bits of meat
and the wisdom to know the difference between the proper course of
self-medication for the results of each

Fill me with Your glorious knowledge of the nationality of the person
that I am greeting, and how many cheek kisses are required; because
otherwise, Lord, it is always kind of awkward.

Grant me the patience to sit through yet another tale of Central Asia
in the early ‘90s, that lo this elderly consultant may one day, acting
in Your name, offer me a job, for only You know when the funding for my
current position may dry up

Lord, may the DJ always play Toto, for I am drunk, and THAT IS MY JAM

Forgive me for saying I was “working from home” the morning after karaoke,
as I forgive the still unsubmitted financial reports of our local partners.

And in Thy wisdom, let today be a public holiday in honor of a former
dictator’s birthday

But failing that, may I not receive too many marriage proposals on my
walk to work, for it shall make me indignant (…but just a couple would
not hurt).

And lead us not into open sewer pits, but deliver us to air
conditioned offices in white land rovers.

AMEN

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. Rich McClear permalink
    September 10, 2012 7:30 am

    Suzi,

    Some of these are pretty good. I especially like the cheek kissing part of the payer and the self medication part.

    Love,

    Rich

  2. September 12, 2012 9:35 am

    pure gold! can i just say that shakira’s “wakka wakka this time for africa” is also a staple to any expat gathering… of course interpretations of local dance ensues

  3. September 14, 2012 3:57 pm

    Amen…

  4. Susan permalink
    September 23, 2012 3:23 pm

    One of my favourite EAW posts so far. Loved it!

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  1. A Lesson is Repeated until it is Learned « Just Another Day in Paradise

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